Last week I heard a teacher say something to the effect of… “Whatever challenges you face in this life, you have faced in previous lives and will continue to face in subsequent lives.” I paraphrase, because my CRS (can’t remember shit) disease prohibits finding the guy and getting the words exact. I absorb ideas through my eardrums and skin and then let them escape from my mouth and fingers when called for, in my own words! Thus, I write.
The point is that you will never change. The remedy for having to continue through eternity carrying the crazy baggage you now lug around is actually quite simple.
Make friends with yourself. For perspective, tilt your head.
The following essay describes how I have done so. And one more thing. There is no such thing as a good or bad chart. Life is what you make of it.
Making the best of a bad chart is a skill you can learn:
Look for Strength at the Angles.
Look for your purpose on the Nodal Axis. I am an Aries/Libra (relationships) person destined to play out my creativity as an artist in public and private.
Understand that Hard Aspects are for practising life skills and that Soft Aspects are like frosting; they are meant to be appreciated when opportunities arise, but not to be eaten as the full meal.
Get intimate with your Mars. Mars is your Power Animal. Your desire. The fuel that motivates you. “Doing your Mars” brings satisfaction to your life. No one else can tell you how to DO.` Your Mars sign will describe how you drive your car.
Learn your Chart Ruler’s Element. Fire, Earth, Air, Water. One of these modes of being will describe your lifestyle. Get a handle on your Element and you will forgive yourself a multitude of sins. I am Gemini, an air sign. My chart ruler, Mercury is in the Earth sign Taurus. That slows down the airy part.
For years before I knew this Astro stuff people would say to me, “You don’t seem like a Gemini. You are different from the Geminis I know.” I knew that was true but did not know why until I learned that my planet Mercury was located in the sign Taurus. And then I learned from Liz Green and Howard Sassportas’ brilliant books that the Mercury group were dead last to report the state of their thinker/talker planet. All the other signs were finished, but the Taurus group could not complete the task. Why? Because they were unable to explain with sincerity until they knew it on a cellular level.
This revelation turned me from a slow witted dullard into a deep thinker. “Oh, that’s why it took me so long to answer the question. I had not fully engaged the experience.” When asked a question, I will often answer it two days later. If you know people like this, and you do, look this up.
I can tell you this much from my own terrible chart and my own difficult journey… Learn your Astrology, your Kabbalah, your Enneagram, your Tarot, your psychology, your Heart, your Mind, your Habits, your Perspectives. Study and learn how to manage the gifts you have been given. Pick one and go for it. They all lead you to The Path.
Learn to do the hard thing, because when you have a crappy map it means that your soul wants a challenge, that you are a hard worker, and that you have a purpose, and it’s in your face all the time. The hard part is accepting it. Tow the line. Make work into a friend.
My map gave me a boy brain with a reclusive feminine experience. I got a shy boy and a brash girl in constant conflict. My anima loves to conquer and my animus insists on doing chores before going out.
The character in charge of my success lives in a deep cave and refuses to meet with the public.
In my Vedic map, I am not scheduled for success in life until I am 70 years old! As a matter of fact, Vedic Astrologers look at my chart, glance away from me, pass the map back to my hand and walk away, softly. I tag along beside them,
“What is it? Can you give me any advice? Just a bit?” They turn away gently, as if to pretend they never saw this page of horror. As if my terrible map could rub off on them. They Will Not Discuss It With Me, Ever! When I was a beginner and went to the Astrology gatherings, I begged people to give me advice, but they would not.
“Oh poor you!” But they don’t say it. And they don’t want to talk to me at the table where the Astrologers are chatting. They look to either side of me, but never to me. That is how bad my chart is! Or is it?
I am now a 73 year old Gemini womun with a crazy history and seemingly little accomplishments, and yet I feel like a rock star. I am “doing my thing” consciously, every day, with feeling, with purpose and meaning. If one person learns one thing from me, then I am successful. I work for posterity because I believe in a continuum. Does belief make this continuum thing real? I don’t know how that works, but I don’t care because believing has made a difference in my life - In a good way, not the “Oops, I’ve got to figure this out in jail!” kind, but the “Glad I’ve got the oars to navigate through this river canyon!”
Could this feeling be what the gurus call “stepping off the wheel”? No, because I am still spinning, and that teacher said, “There is no getting off the wheel.” I find that concept quite comforting, possibly because it feels like eternity, and if the Now is Eternal, then, it’s good to be here. I have heard it’s easier when you move to the hub where the turning is slower than the outer wheel.
The ultimate success in navigating any chart requires the simple knowledge that the chart, this etheric map, is not me or you. It is a snapshot of the weather on the day, in the place where we were born. It is the stew we entered into at that precise moment. Don’t step on the pile of poo in the corner. You know it’s always there. Keep that in mind when you are rushing across the hall to answer the front door.
The stage is set. Deep breath, now…. ACTION!